BDSM Newbie

This introduction to BDSM (bondage, domination and Sado-Masochistic) takes the route that I can to it when I was around 14yo.  For me, much of my sexual activities happened at Scout Camp. Being a Sea Scout we had to learn a lot about ropes, knots and what was best for what and why. We also learnt how to improvise and make rafts, tying allsorts together so they would hold firm. During the evenings in the tents you will discover things like wanking games, like who can shoot the furthest or on who as target practise, developing the sub/dom thing.

Further sub/dom games (might be bullying to others), included holding a guy down and boot shining his balls, or shaving what pubes he had.

Also in the tent, you discover about wanking techniques, and how to over come the problem of being cut.
Then came the discovery of cock rings.
This took the form of imaginative use of my scouts 'woggle' which was a leather strap and I could only put on when soft. After that came the discovery of a brass curtain ring for one of the boys in the tent. Slipping this over my dick gave me rock  hard hard-ons, though sometimes I thought I would never get the ring off again. This was tricky cos you are so aroused, the ring keeps you aroused so it does not come off. Then you think of everything to go soft.

This is the early years where the slave learns to control his mind. This is one of the thinks that will differentiate   you from other guys later on in life is your ability to control you mind and body. The other will be your heightened level of sensuality.

Basic Equipment

This takes the form of whatever you can hide in your bedroom and if it was found it would look quite innocent.

• Leather boot lace - This was good for all kinds of bock and ball bondage. My favourite still today is like a figure of eight between my balls and cock. well it starts off with a knot around my cock and balls at the root, then one just around the cock, then from there one around the balls, the around the whole lot again.
  These are not good for tying up hands as the lace is so thin it cuts in and stops blood flow. Though have used it for this reason. As part of SM training you need to know the rules, the cause and effect so you know why the rule is there should you wish to break it.
   
• Rope - normally in 1 and 2 meter lengths. Use soft nylon sailing rope. Also most scouts would have this to practise all their knot skills for their badges. I learn my knows from my days in cubs before scouts, but in time I got better rope. The reality is that you make do with what it available and used your imagination. If you get soft nylon rope when you need to the the rope undone it does not jam up like when its wet.
   
• Chain and Padlocks - This is where you are exploring auto-bondage (tying your self up) and trying to make your first hand cuffs. You might even get some long enough to use on your buddy.
   
• Hand cuffs - You can get your first pair from almost any Army Surplus store. They are also a fashion accessory for many youth cults typically Punk and Alternatives. They can be worn as park of a belt (as the buckle), or hanging/cuffed to a loop in your jeans. On the right if you want them used on you, on the left if you want to use them on some else, on the centre loop at the back if you can go either way.  Some of my teenage friends would lock a padlock to the relevant loop to be more subtle.
   
• Blind Folds - For me this first started using my Scouts Neckerchief. It gets a bit bad when you have to test that they cannot see, so often the pillow goes over as well. Though you have to make sure they can breath, some make sure its up a bit.
   
• Gags - Again for me this first started using my Scouts Neckerchief, then socks were held in by it. Ideally for someone else as part of the sub/dom thing it would be my stinky boot socks. Some other exploration at the sports shop for balls to make your own ball gags happened. Practise on yourself so you know what the other guy is going to feel.
   
• Tit Clamps - For me this first started using Clothes pegs/pins as they were well hard enough on my sensitive tits. They were so unused to play. That anything on them felt either too much, ticklish or whatever.
  It takes a little time to play with them, kneading them like getting the wiring connected between the brain and the dick. Once done then its one of the fastest ways to get you hard and to drive you into a sexual frenzy.
  Later you can explore how they feel on your cock and balls.
  You might find the sharp pain in different places very erotic others less so - so this is a period of experimentation for you; what are your buttons. Once you know yours when you play with someone else, you try on then what works for you. you are now developing your empathy skills. You continue doing stuff to him until he says stop. You agree a key words other than Stop, eg "halt" or "cheese burger". Usually best to have the odd one because it throws your head space into another place away from the SM and firmly back in the real world.
   
• Ruler - In this case getting a shatter proof plastic ruler, so you can spank with it. Its light enough for erotic development. you can learn how to develop a percussive rhythm. This is achieved by holding it in your finger tips and trying to get the end of the ruler to bounce in a uniform and consistent oscillation. You will need this skill when you progress up to canes and riding crops.
  If you hold it in your fist you can get greater force, which you might want to use after you have sensitized and aroused the other guys body with the sensual spanking described above.
  You can start off with the guy just over your knee and spanking him. This is really like caressing his butt, where he seems to be coming to his limit you just smooth his butt with your warm and massaging his cheeks, getting him more aroused, then start over. You need this done to you so you know what its like how you like it so you can do it to someone else they way you like it done to you. You are further developing your empathy skills
   
• Belts - In this case you can get a decent leather belt - normally you get one that makes you look very masculine this is typical of teenagers, as they are staking out the maleness. For me I looks at two types.
  1. This was a thick leather black  belt that could be folded in two and used, but looked very mail when on. I could use just the end of it to slap a guy. It had its own strength and would stay fairly erect. I could gently spank a guys tits ass, cock or even balls. 
  2. The softer belt can only be used when folded in two on the butt, it cannot stand erect on its own. This is used to strap the ass and back. when beating the upper back and you get good at it you can use the complete length unfolded. Of course you old the buckle end as you are not damaging him and the belt does not slip out of your hands.
  This is where you have to learn to whip the back with control. You can practise on a pillow (a white pillow might get marked with some belts). When you whip with a belt etc - don't forget that the end of the belt can slap really hard on the sides of the body.
  You remember from your physics classes about acceleration and angles of rotation. What you see happening is that the belt is moving at one speed (its length might be a 80cm long), it hits the body, and stops al except for the remaining 3cm that have now speeded up; all the energy that was even over the last 80cm has moved to the remaining 3cm  tip.
  This can leave marks and bruises. What you want later in life but not when you have to explain them.
  
  Remember at this stage you are learning sensual skills. Learning safely how to explore think that makes the other guy feel good or to turn him on.
  He will have suggestions as to what he really likes as well. Typically you both have fantasies that you want to safely explore.
   
• Anal toys - For me this started off with the rounded end of a broom stick. I drilled a hole at the other end so I could attach some string so there was no chance of me loosing it in side. This also meant with the shorter one I could go out with it up my butt all day but with the string tied around my cock and balls. Needless to say I was randy as hell when I got back in. If I was doing my Saturday job, then all day I was being aroused.
  Typically I would buy a thin rubber balloon to go over the wood as I did not want splinters in my butt hole, and anyhow how could I explain it to the doctor (all of which knew my parents professionally).
  The rubber balloon would smell after a while so I would have a second layer or use a Durex condom.
  NOTE: To flush a Durex down the loo fill it up with water like 500ml then flush the loo and as its flushing drop it like a bomb down the pan, the weight and the flushing will see it shoot far away.
   
• Boots - When you are young these are hard to find or afford. I got my pair of tall German parra boots from Army Surplus. There are now fashion tall Adidas boxer boots, that some teenage SM boys go for.  But real army boots feel good, good to lick and good to use. You choice which gets your dick hard? If you can avoid getting the short 'pixi' boots then do so, but you get what you can get. Trainers can also be cool depends of the image you are going for.
   

Basic Skills

With the essential equipment that you have stashed around your bedroom. If any one bit of it is found nothing would be thought of it, if it was in one box your parents might start thinking or asking questions. When the stuff is all over the place (but tidy and hidden), everything you have could have another innocent purpose.
You can also do with a box of tissues in your room for cleaning up - since your parents may be the ones emptying your waste bin, they will notice the number of crunch tissues in there. You might want to take control and empty your bin or flush away anything you don't want your parents seeing. This is a period of discovery for you - equally your parents want what is best for you, you are discovering your independence (you will only get this when you go to University) so there will be conflict sometimes. Some parents are cool others have hang-ups which they project on you as faults.
Don't forget they control your environment - what would you do if you were kicked out of the house?
Like don't tell them you are gay unless you have to or you have a plan-B; whilst my parents were ok about it (they were in the medical profession), I have no adverse reaction, except the why my son, and the 'no grand children' think.

• Bondage   (workshop) - This you well develop in time. You may either be the type that just wants to secure the guy, so handcuffs would be fine. You might be the kind of guy that is into bondage in its own right, even to the point of Japanese Rope bondage. One of the main principles of bondage is balance. That is is you are going to tie a guys hands high  above his head, one should not be higher than the other as it will form a distraction from what you are doing. Worst still is when the guy is pretending to be secure when the rope has come undone. As a kid this drove me crazy where if I was tied to the bed spread eagled, and one leg was secure and the other was flopping about.
  
   
• Sado-Masochistic Sex (workshop) -
  Often for good reason referred to as Sexual Magic.
   
• Sensuality - This takes the form of subtle touches, heightening they other guys sense and playing them as a musician would play any fine instrument. You can hypnotise a person just with they way you stroke their body. As the name suggests you are addressing the sensations for the senses - so this is how your 501s feel against your naked body as you fuck him with your jeans on, what if you were being fucked and you felt the leather or rubber against your skin, what if you got turned on by silky sports shorts. Part of this is like broadening the spectrum for the ablity to perceive pleasure then to master each one of those as an art form in its own right.
   
• Empathy -
   
• Sensitivity - One of the key skills you develop is heightening your senses.
  This can start off by being tied down and blindfolded and the other guy
   
• Oral Sex -  This is loads of fun. Dont think the mouth is just for kissing. Dogboy are by their nature VERY ORAL. Also use your tongue to lick around the body use it like an artists brush. You can lick at a guys arm pits, you can lick his neck or his cropped head, as well as licking and sucking his cock and balls.
   
• Anal Sex -  One of the first mistakes to make is using no lube. Often this first starts by just putting a finger up there. You get in by  will power and its sort during and after. Next time you spit and push. Just because its lubed on the outside, what makes you think its going to be lubed on the inside? There is no substitute for enough lube. You can never have enough especially when beginning. You can use hand cream to start with because that is in the bathroom any how.
  
   
• Self Confidence -